Category Archives: Bizspeak

Bizspeak I Don’t Care For #2

If you really listen, I mean REALLY LISTEN to the tone when your corporate superiors, or inferiors, start jargonating all this bizspeak at each other, you may just hear the reason that these ordinary words have been so grossly transmutated into needless and meaningless bizspeak. The tone is one of false or prefabricated enthusiasm and, like a Rorschach inkblot test, it is up to each individual to try and tease out the meaning of this tone for his or herself.

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Bizspeak I Don’t Care For #1

Hopefully, the first of many posts on this subject. In honor of my Grandmother–who, when as a child at the Sunday dinner table I would say I “hate” something, would respond, Sam, say ‘I don’t care for’ instead. Here is a sampling of the corporate speak designed to obfuscate the issue at hand that I hear nearly every day.

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ROI– Return on Investment. Basically, if a company implements any product, service, or practice that has a fixed cost, and then something is gained, then that is de facto an ROI. In economics, this is a descriptive mechanism for measuring the health of an investment … If I buy a one dollar bill for two dollars, and then spend my one dollar, the result is a 50% ROI, I gained half as much as I put into the investment.Which is to say, I made a horrific investment … Continue reading